ACCEPTANCE

ACCEPTANCE

I haven’t written anything in so long.  I wish I could describe the past two years feelings and get them on my laptop but I just don’t feel the need like I did a year ago.  I am wondering if I have reached that final stage where your insides start to let go of all that you were suffering and you begin to move on.  that day of acceptance…. there are so many stages of grief you go thru you don’t ever feel like acceptance is even an option, like it is something so far away from your reach.  but I really believe that is what is going on with me now. thank god. I no the journey to healing isn’t over yet but I have hit a major change in how I feel about all of this.  and for that I welcome change.   I can finally let go and move forward.  I regret I didn’t write every day about my experience but I couldn’t.  I was completely broken and paralyzed.  the words just wouldn’t come out any more I just shut down.  but the worst is over and I just realized that I am starting to get a little tiny life.  two years  ago I was sitting completely alone and in shock learning that the guy I loved and trusted was in fact a sociopath..  and nobody understood what was really going on but me.  I had no one around me I was completely isolated.  not a good feeling.  but things are looking up and now maybe I can try and write about what its like to recover from a relationship with a sociopath.  acceptance, yes.  its a good place to finally be. 
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