narcissists are the cruelest people walking the planet, they never get well and stop abusing you for long, just once in awhile they are nice to you because they want something from you, they will say their sorry and in the same sentance they will say…….but if you wouldn’t have done that i wouldn’t have to react this way. it will always be your fault that he is lying, always your fault he is cheating, always your fault he goes off into narcissistic rages. if you stay its always going to be because you weren’t good enough. all these are lies but you get so dependent on the narcissist and they are so mentally abusive and fuck with your mind so badly that you become a total victim. they steal your friends, your money, your children if they can, they want to hurt you and destroy you its what they do. what they live for. remember this a narcissist hates his victim especially when you are weak and hurt they despise weakness in caring people they see us as a joke. this is not love in any form i don’t care how nice he can be for a few days its all bullshit smoke and mirrors with a narc and the smartest and best thing you can do at this point is run as far away from him as you can get and never look back. we are not full of shit this is the truth and i pray you grasp onto something here that helps you heal from all this but healing is gonna hurt like hell and its gonna take time but like most of us here , it can be done. we are proof you can be ok and find a better life for yourself and we will be there every step of the way. keep reading the articles and really open your eyes to what is happening to you. narcissists are emotional vampires and they leave when theres nothing of you left to take it sounds like you are to that point take back your life.